How to Get Kids to Pitch In

Mom: “Paul, please bring those dishes into the kitchen and put them in the dishwasher.” Paul:    “They’re not mine.” Mom: “You live in this house, right?   So you have to pitch in.” Paul:    “But it’s not my responsibility.” Mom: “Just do it, Paul.” Paul:    “Okay, but I don’t see why I have to…” Sound familiar?   You are not alone.  It’s often very difficult to motivate children to “pitch in” and help with everyday family chores.   One way that children try to get out of … [Read more...]

Four Fears that Undermine Good Parenting

Many of us, as parents, harbor some unfounded fears that, if left unchecked, can easily get in the way of our attempts to be good parents. Nice Parent, Mean Parent Have you ever noticed how often parents speak – even in jest – of being “nice” or “mean” to their children?  “My son wanted  to go to a friend’s house before finishing his homework.  I didn’t let him, and he missed the chance to see his friend.  I’m such a mean parent!”  “She knows she can get whatever she wants from her Dad.  … [Read more...]

How to Parent with Attitude

David Elkind, the famous developmental psychologist, once wrote that “parenting is an attitude”.   I recall that when I read this statement, many years ago, I didn’t quite understand it.  I had a glimmer of what he meant, but I kept thinking: What type of attitude?  And it can’t just be an attitude, right?  After all, a parent actually has to do something to raise children. I think I understand now what Elkind meant.  There is, as you know, a lot of advice out there, from a variety of … [Read more...]