By Michael F. Mascolo, Ph.D. Several years ago, I bought my wife a silver bar bearing the question, “What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?” It was meant to be an inspirational gift. Its message, of course, is quite clear: We tend to avoid challenging projects out of a fear of failure. Failing breeds shame, humiliation and other bad things. If we could only get rid of our fear of failure, who knows what we could accomplish? For several years, my wife kept the silver … [Read more...]
How Children Develop Into Moral Teens and Adults
May 6, 2013 By
by Michael F. Mascolo, Ph.D. The key to fostering the development of moral behavior in children is to help children build a bridge between self-interest and concern for others. Children and adults who act in morally exemplary ways are those who have formed a “moral identity” – a sense of self in which concern for the welfare of others plays a central role. Such individuals gain a sense of self-satisfaction by being committed to a moral code. They measure themselves in terms of what they can … [Read more...]
Find Yourself by Giving: Host an International Student Child this Summer
March 30, 2013 By
by Kate Schwartz As a mother of five kids living on the North Shore, working part time is a challenge...to say the least! In a recent job interview, the ‘young’ woman opposite me asked if I knew how to “multi-task”. I think I raised one eyebrow before politely replying. I applied for this particular part time job because it was with a non-profit. As a British born and bred transplant with a husband from Beverly, I thought I would be able to identify with the ‘customer’: teenage kids from … [Read more...]
I Hate Multiple-Choice
March 29, 2013 By
I hate multiple-choice tests. And tests that involve matching, fill in the blanks and all other such silliness. To be honest, I’m not a big fan of tests at all. That’s because tests are generally not designed with genuine learning in mind. If they were, our tests would look very different. And we would rarely, if ever, use tests of the multiple-choice variety. So, why do I hate multiple-choice tests? Let me count the ways. Objection 1: Most Multiple-Choice Tests Tell Us Very Little About … [Read more...]
Why “A” is a Bad Grade
March 29, 2013 By
Actually,“A” is a wonderful grade – perfection! But maybe it should be reserved for, well, perfect performance. But how often does that happen? Jack is one of my gym buddies. We have gotten into the habit of giving grades to our workouts. Jack will say, “Well, how did you do today?" I might say,“Oh, today was only a C+.” Jack might reply,“Okay, well there’s always tomorrow.” One day, in response to Jack’s caring query, I said,“Well, today was a B+”. Jack replied jokingly,“Oooh. You almost … [Read more...]
The Noble Craft of Self-Perfection: It’s Not Perfectionism!
March 29, 2013 By
Always dream and shoot higher than you know you can do. Do not bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than yourself. — William Faulkner Understanding the difference between healthy striving and perfectionism is critical to laying down the shield and picking up your life. Research shows that perfectionism hampers success. In fact, it’s often the path to depression, anxiety, addiction and life paralysis. — Brené Brown At its root, perfectionism … [Read more...]
Making Learning Fun
March 28, 2013 By
by Michael F. Mascolo, PhD There have been some interesting Op-Ed pieces in the New York Times recently about the process of learning. Here are two opposing positions on our recent penchant for “making learning fun”. In Building Self-Control, The American Way (New York Times, February 17, 2013), Sandra Aamodt and Sam Wang respond to recent books that offer a critique of American styles of teaching, learning and parenting. For example, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother (Chau, 2011) provided an … [Read more...]
Big Announcement: Something Special Just for YOU!
March 28, 2013 By
by Suzanne Provencher, Publisher Hello again, dear readers! I am very excited to share some big news with all of you: We have a new and improved website! (www.northshorefamilies.com) Our new site features many of the things you enjoyed on our “old” site –but with new features designed to further help you and your North Shore family thrive and develop into all that you can be – as individuals of all ages, interests and needs – and as evolving family units. Our site now features Ask Dr. … [Read more...]
Getting Kids Up and Out in the Morning
February 26, 2013 By
"Ask Dr. Mike" is an interactive feature where you can ask our Editor, Michael F. Mascolo, PhD, a parenting, education, family or development question you may have. Do you need to know why your child behaves as he/she does? Do you need a way to bring your family unit back together in more meaningful ways? Are you struggling as a parent with your own development questions? Well, Ask Dr. Mike! It’s free and family friendly – and designed for you. Email your questions to … [Read more...]
